7 distinguishing features of a spoiled child
Error modern parents – ‘s ambivalent attitude to the child, the lack of clear rules of parenting and permissiveness. Kids quickly learn how to manipulate parents and other relatives for the sake of obtaining the desired and allowed in the course of a variety of tricks: tears, tantrums, aggression, etc. as a result of improper training of the little monsters grow adults Infante, who will be for many years parents to use for their own benefit. Let’s see how well you nurture the baby. Perhaps he is already showing the traits needed and it is time to take urgent measures?
The child presents himself most of the time
You are busy all the time at work and time on the education does not remain. The child plays and sometimes doesn’t behave in the best way. Instead of curbing bad behavior – you give the kid whatever he wants for the sake of your own peace of mind. Thus, the child learns from an early age about proper manipulation of parental feelings. As a means of control parents he is likely to use tantrums and aggression.
Child – a family center
All the needs of your baby instantly ride, only the child to Express irritation. Grandparents, aunts and uncles – all are happy to serve the whims of the crumbs. Moreover, raising no deals, all pampered child because of capacity. Between relatives is an unspoken competition for the love of a child and no one wants to be in the role of “bad”. As you can imagine – the absence of rules of conduct and framework of a bad influence on a child’s character. This baby gets used that any request is immediately executed, he does not react to the word “no”.
Senaratne encouraging bad behavior and ignoring the good
With strong parental employment, the only way to get their attention – it tears hysterical. Only in this case, ignore the baby becomes impossible parents and, finally, pay attention to the needs of the crumbs. But the good behavior of the baby like cleaning their toys remains unclaimed. As a result, the child understands that good deeds do not appreciate, but the bad – attract the attention of parents. Over time the kid will only accept a punishment and a cry that is signed negative emotions instead of positive reinforcement.
The lack of clear rules and boundaries of behavior
Today for one will be punished, tomorrow ’ s praise, in the day after tomorrow – will ignore. One day mom pays the school with your child for several hours, and in another – generally ignores the training of the baby. Or mom keeping a clear line of education, and the grandmother allows the baby everything. As a result of this “education” the child has not developed clear concepts of good behaviour, he is behaving inappropriately. Fault the baby is not here – rather blame the parents and other relatives involved in education. The result of this treatment, he will rise or very pampered, or a real neurotic.
You told the child to put away their toys, and in return promised him candy. The kid, in turn, refused service, stamping their feet. You, as a compassionate mother, decided to reduce the conflict “no” and gave him the promised gift just. What happened? The child understood that it is not necessary to do something for the sake of the desired, because mommy will satisfy any request just so – just a little bit capricious. To inconsistent parenting are frequent violations of the regime, when in one day you put your baby to sleep without cartoon and sweets for the night, and the next day was so busy that the child could not lie down to sleep late, have reviewed all possible cartoons and ate too much sweets. Inconsistency in the words and deeds of parents – one of the most critical mistakes in parenting.
Class parents are particularly prone to excessive generosity to the baby. Daily expensive gift for no reason and buy expensive toys only one request of the child have not the best influence on the character of the baby. Soon he will start to get angry at the lack of gifts and the blame will be just former “donors”. Or you will have “fork” in new gifts, just to appease the insatiable child. Needless to say that the insatiable child will grow day by day and soon he will begin to expect more expensive gifts? By the way, for the baby all these gifts don’t matter much. Surely you have seen how quickly bored kid a new toy and a few hours after purchase, they took a seat with the rest somewhere in a drawer or corner. For kid parent gifts – a proof of love. He would gladly have traded all toys in the world for a pleasant pastime with mom and dad, but they are always too busy for games with a toddler and compensate for the guilt endless gifts.
“the Talk” during tantrums
Children’s hysterical – the way to attract attention and get what you want. Many parents and compassionate grandmother can’t stand to look at a child in hysterics, believe such behavior is dangerous to the health of the crumbs. So they immediately rush to a crying baby and give him everything that he wants, if only hysterics stopped. And it ’ s a great way to grow up spoiled “before” the man who in adult life will be to achieve the desired tears and aggression. This behavior is perceived as a child, but a grown man behaving this way – a sad sight.
How parents behave, so it’s not a spoiled kid “monster”? Try to adhere to the following rules:
Set the rules in the family and making sure your child unconditionally followed. No concessions out of pity. The child has family responsibilities as well as its other members.
Be consistent. Promises must be enforced without exception. Stick to sleep, rest and entertainment. It is desirable to impart to the child a clear schedule.
Ignore tantrums. When a child falls into a tantrum, there are two ways of reaction: ignoring and distraction of attention. First try second – switch attention to something else. If this method does not work – ignore the tantrum. Several such hysterical reactions and the kid will understand that the tears – a waste of time and effort.
Use a light punishment. There are due to psychological rather than physical punishment. For example, for bad behavior, you can deprive a child of sweets or pick up favourite toys to put in the corner for a few minutes. Be sure to explain to your child what the penalty is, and how it could have been avoided. Try to talk calmly in the midst of punishment, to prevent aggression.
Show a positive example. Lot toddler to learn from the parents themselves, so you yourself must be an example to follow, not only to make the kid behave in a certain way.
See tips for raising a spoiled child: